Fergie has opened up about her lowest point during her battle with an addiction to crystal meth.
The singer spoke to British publication iNews, discussing her pre-Black Eyed Peas days.
Fergie discussed a period in her life during which she found herself “hallucinating on a daily basis.”
“It took a year after getting off that drug for the chemicals in my brain to settle so that I stopped seeing things,” she added. “I’d just be sitting there, seeing a random bee or bunny.”
She also revealed that at one point she believed that the CIA, FBI and a SWAT team were tracking her every move and sought refuge at a church.
“They tried to kick me out, because I was moving down the aisles in this crazy way, as I thought there was an infrared camera in the church trying to check for my body,” Fergie recalled.
The singer continued, “I bolted past the altar into a hallway and two people were chasing me. I remember thinking: ‘If I walk outside, and the SWAT team’s out there, I was right all along. But if they’re not out there, then it’s the drugs making me see things and I’m going to end up in an institution. And if it really is the drugs, I don’t want to live my life like this anymore, anyway.’”
She said that there was no SWAT team waiting in the parking lot for her. “It was a freeing moment,” Fergie said.
“The drugs thing, it was a hell of a lot of fun … until it wasn’t. But you know what, I thank the day it happened to me. Because that’s my strength, my faith, my hope for something better,” she said.
The former Black Eyed Peas member has been very open about her drug use in the hope that her story would help others.
She told Time that her drug addiction “was the hardest boyfriend I ever had to break up with.”
“I dug deep as to why I got there. It’s the drug that’s addicting. But it’s why you start doing it in the first place that’s interesting,” Fergie said. “A lot of it was being a child actor; I learned to suppress feelings.”
Fergie said she has two major priorities in her life right now — promoting her new album, Double Duchess, and making sure her son Axl is being cared for following her separation from husband Josh Duhamel.
“Both Josh and I are working full-time right now. It gets tough and we get tired, but we’re trying our hardest to make sure that kid feels nothing but love,” Fergie said of her four-year-old son. “There’s a lot going on. That’s why we wanted to find our footing with our separation before we announced it publicly, to make sure we really got it together for our kid. It’s a constant juggling act.”